As I listen to Love Yourz by J. Cole on repeat I start to ponder on that what if’s and the would have, could haves on my life. I could have never imagined my life to be this beautiful as it is right now. Not to say I’ve never had any doubts, comparisons, or unbearable obstacles to over come because I have. The biggest of my problems was reflecting on if I made the right decisions in my life and if I would have taken another route where I would result. I’ve worked extremely hard to get to where I am but I think could I have taken a easier route?
Nonsense, is the answer now but for a while I struggled with answering that question. Because it seemed no matter the newer levels I raised to it just didn’t seem good enough to society. Crazy to think that society dictates my accomplishments but that’s how naive I would think. And to be honest I don’t even think it was naive it was just stupid talk. So I would dig my nose deep into work, once I accomplished a task I would think would this get me noticed amongst others? Nope, so I kept going. To clarify, society to me weren’t strangers, they were friends, family, and associates I knew. Throughout all my working I never looked up to see how far I’ve came. Never once did I say wow kudos to myself. Instead I thought I should have done this and maybe the load would have been easier.
But at the end of the day there is no easier route, alternative, or choice that would have brought me to any place better than where I am now. And even if there was, who cares? “Don’t be sleepin on your level cause its beauty in the struggle. No such thing as a life that’s better than yours.- J. Cole“ It doesn’t matter what different or more better outcome I paint for myself because its not as great as mine. I didn’t grow up in any fairytale and my journey to my own personal success hasn’t been a peach. Fell on hard times, pain, and a lot of tears but it has equipped me to the woman I am today. Truly I’ve been blessed to make it thus far and I can only get excited for what is in store. It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks around me or what they measure my work to be. My opinion is the only one that matters to me, myself, and I. With all of the work I’ve done if no one on earth decides to give myself a pat on the back I will gladly give myself one. Not to take any of the credit for myself, God did it all! He ordered my steps and made a way for me, and that’s bigger than anything.
So I’m saying all of this to say if you’re pondering about your life, what could have been, and if you’re accomplishments are good enough, end the nonsense. Your life is as great as what you make it to be and you hold all the cards. What could have happened didn’t happen and your life could only get better through prayer, hard work, dedication, and remarkable ambition. Yes, you are GREAT and that’s nothing to measure or prove to anyone but yourself. The word “enough” shouldn’t even be in your vocabulary because there is no ceiling to what you want to conquer. Always remember to love yours.